A profile without photos is like a summer vacation nowhere near a beach. And since we’re talking about profile photos and beaches, don’t just post pictures of beaches. No matter how pretty they are. If we wanted to look at landscapes, we’d open a National Geographic.

If there’s a beach photo, you need to be in it. Now, if you believe you look terrible in every photo, you’re probably right, especially if:

• it’s obvious you’ve cropped out your ex
• your better-looking friends are standing next to you
• the photo looks like it’s from the 90s, or
• it’s a wedding photo and you’re the groom

You need new pictures. Here are some tips on what to wear and how to show up in them:

Sunglasses, aka the accessory of mystery

The number one rule is don’t wear sunglasses in all your photos, please limit them to one or two. Don’t try to look cool. Your eyes, your gaze and your smile are the most important elements that make someone feel, “I could connect with this person.” Also, if you’re wearing a hat in every single picture, that’s suspicious. If you’ve lost your hair, don’t try to hide it.

Jacket or blazer: yes. Tie: no.

A tie makes you look too closed-off and overly serious. It gives the impression that your career is your whole life, and it doesn’t exactly scream “fun date.” It’s like talking about yourself using your résumé. This isn’t LinkedIn. Show your relaxed, human side, not your professional one, with casual or smart casual outfits. Layering a shirt on top of a t-shirt and your favorite pair of jeans or chinos, is a fail-proof outfit idea.

(Of course, if you have one great, professionally taken photo in a tie where you’re smiling and look amazing, you can absolutely keep that one.

Variety is key

You want a woman to feel she could fit into your life. Choose photos from different moments: nature, travel, work, events, sports, so she can get a glimpse of your lifestyle and see whether your worlds might fit into each other.

Sexy or cringe?

If you’ve got a good body, it’s natural to want to show it off, but not in more than one (1) beach photo, and definitely not a bathroom selfie. Careful with gym photos, too: if you look like you’re flexing, it just looks ridiculous. In general, avoid giving the impression that you care more about your appearance than your personality or more about you than about the person you’re hoping to meet. 

Glasses

If you’re over 35 or 40, think about when you last updated them. If it’s been more than five years, it may be time for a new pair. Just like untrimmed thinning hair, outdated glasses can make you look older than you are and, let’s be honest, a bit sad. Refresh your look with new frames and a fresh haircut. Time for a comeback.

Have a different outfit for your first date

There’s an old meme that goes like this:

“On my first date with my husband, he wore a really nice shirt.

On our second date, he wore another really nice shirt, and I thought, wow, a man with great style and wardrobe. On the third date, I realized… okay, he owns two shirts.”

If you show up to a date wearing the exact same outfit as in your profile picture, she’ll think you don’t have anything else decent to wear.

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