The term “feminist dating” is a bit cringe, I know, but it’s only temporary. Because dating needs updating. As we know it, it’s old-fashioned, archaic and problematic, based on ideas and ideals of the past.
A little of the 1800s, where the man had to be a gentleman and the woman a “lady”. A little of the 1950s, with the man being a provider and the woman a virgin and home maker, a little of the 70s sexual liberation, meaning sex before marriage is allowed, but women can’t have a body count over 5 or they are cheap sluts. A little of the 80s and 90s, when we read on women’s magazines “10 ways to drive him wild in bed” -just the man, because female pleasure was too complicated and the clitoris a mythical organ like the horn of a unicorn, and on top of that, you’d better fake an orgasm to look cool and make the man feel good. At the same time, we had the idea that women are supposed to play hard to get, so no means yes, so out of the window goes consent.
Add a dash of porn culture, where abuse becomes the norm, and throw it all in the dating apps mixing bowl. The cocktail is toxic. That’s why I decided to write a book and start a movement redefining dating between men and women, so that it’s healthy, fun, equal and mutually pleasurable. Feminist dating is the dating you want, even if you still haven’t come to terms with the word “feminism”.